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Still in love but think its all over, should i divorce her??

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My husband and I have been married for 10 years. In the past two his mother and I became quite good friends. About 3 months ago she and I had a falling out and now she has convinced him that I have been unfaithful. I have not, nor never intend to be, but my husband believes her. We have had many talks about it but he still doesnt trust me. He wants to know every move I make and complains when I want to even talk to my friends. I cant live like this but I dont want to get divorced either. HELP!

my wife is divorsing me, after 9 years of marriage? she is currently pregnate 2 months. There has been physical abuse by her in the last two years. She says she does not love me and wants money now... the process in a short quick time. Like if she wants it to happen before the baby is born. I travel alot for 2 to 3 weeks at a time. We were celebrating my birthday on the 13th of aug. Then when we were just talking she mentioned that the baby would be born in june, then i caught her and said june? Since that time she has mad my life a living hell. We have two children 6 year old girl and a 3 year old boy.
what do i do let her divorse me, fight,i have never heard of this? She does not want any money, and does not let me see my children.

My husband will not stay the night at my parents house. He has a distant relationship from his own parents and only calls them about once a month. I am tired of making excuses to my parents about why he won't spend the night. What should I do?

This is because u think about your parents more,and u r still attached to them.most of the indian origin women do not have other world than their parents.

learn to live without them.

My husband and I were born and brought up in America. We met while we were both studying in professional schools and he was my first love. We stuck together through good times and bad times for 5 years until we finally got married. He was caring, compassionate and extremely social. I am the same way, except that I have embraced my heritage and have Indian family values. Since we've been married he does not want to socialize with anyone. He stays in the basement and could spend weekends there. He never calls my parents except to return phone calls. The fact of the matter is, I am an extremely loving and mature person and have kept great ties with his parents. My husband on the other hand has become immensely immature and lazy and has lost all ambitions. He is comfortable with the fact that we are living paycheck to paycheck and he has to ask me for money. This was not the ambitious lawyer I married. On the contrary he still has not passed his Bar exam and it has been several years since he graduated law school. I am trying to save our marriage. He does not listen to me and can go weeks without talking to me. What hurts me most is that my parents are seeing me depressed. I would prefer suffering the rest of my life with him if it meant that he would atleast return their phone calls and save face. This is a miserable situation. PLEASE HELP.
Sincerely,
SAD WIFE

Ive been marrried for 9 years and slowly we have been drifting apart both physically and emotionally.
These days my wife doesnt even kiss me anymore, not even a peck on the cheek. I am really missing the emotional bond we once had as she now appears to give all the love she has to our 7 year old daughter. Im happy she has so much love for her, but am sad beyond belief that she has none left for me.
We fail to communicate properly and when I try to discuss things of this nature with her she ignores my pleas walks away.
I am at wits end and really dont know what to do.
I know she wont come to counciling with me, but I will go on my own to get advice from a professional for my own satisfaction as I really need someone to talk to about this. Im sure she still loves me but Im not sure if it is just like a friend now as she wont talk about things and I think she is just usued to having me around rather than truely wanting me.
I missly miss her despite living in the same house and I miss the intimacy that we once shared.
Does anyone have any comments about this and what I should do in this apparently unhopeful situation

Anon,some men r like that,why he is comparing u with other lady,may be u slow or not doing as it should be.ask him how he want,and tell him,to do the same and u will follow.if he cann`t,then tell him,all ppl r not same,they take thier own time to do some stuff.but don`t make it as a Xcuse,try to learn things if u r housewife.
As he is 19 year older than u,may be some of his idieas/thinking r old fashioned.but why u married,with much age difference.

your Parents and siblings will be with u always anymore.do not attach with them more.some men offend when thier wife ask guidence with her mother/sister for every word.

you are not slave,to beat,tell him nicely,otherwise next time he will land in jail.law is there to protect you.but do not try to misuse law,they may break your marriage.

my husband treats me like a maid. he compares me with any other lady. he wants me to uproot mountain but cannot encourage me in anything when i fail. he is ninten years older than me and wants me to do everything just the way he does.
he hates me keeping company not even seeing my parents around me nor my siblings.
infact the house is too hot for me to stay as he beats me like a slave. i want to file out

I think my husband is cheating, I have a 5 month old daughter,
Sophia. this morning he went to visit a friend recovering from
cancer surgery 4 hours away...same residence of his ex that has
been calling him lately. He refused to let us come with
him....said we would be in the way, it's toofar, weather is too
bad, he wanted to listen ti his music, his recovering friend hates
babies, he wants to spend time with his old guy friends without
our presence pressuring him. he even threatened that if we went
then he would not go and said I am not giving him freedom.
What's happening?

Anonymous, take it easy,may be after child birth he may change, don`t take tention,that cause problem for baby.hope everything will be ok.PRAY.
best of luck

I am 7 1/2 months pregnant and my husband has left me. There is really no good reason. He won't talk to me. The only thing he has told me is we are to different. I feel like I have really tried in our marriage maybe to hard. He is a selfish person and will not compromise and will not talk. I feel like I have to walk on tip toe when it comes to things that bother me because he will just leave for a day or a week if he is mad. He told me he wanted to sepeate but he didn't know if he wanted a divorce. I feel like he is giving up to soon. I feel like the reason he is giving me is not good enough. He has also said he is unhappy and I get on his nerves. I really feel he has a depression problem but he won't admit it. I told him I thought we should try marriage counciling but he won't. He is staying with a friend and drinking every night.I feel like he abandoned me. I really need him right now and he is just thinking about himself. Should I leave him alone? Do you think I should file for legal sepeation so I know he will help me when I am on maternity leave an after? What should I do? I don't want A divorce.

I have been married some 4 years and currently going throught the first stages of divorce, I didn't file !. We have a child 6 months and one on the way, in the latter stages of pregnancy, my wife changed, as a personality she was always narcisistic, and quite ruthless, but I loved her nevertheless, without condition. Smart as I thought I was I assumed she would grow out of it. I participated both physically and emotionally with the birth, up until about the seventh day, on which she stated quite categorically that I would never bond with this child. Immediately I sought to find out what I had done wrong, researched post pardum, etc, I even tried help with her family, who didn't and still don't acknowledge a problem. Well since that time she has guarded the child, and never let me near him for more than 10 mins or so, moved to her parents, and I did get to see the child for an hour once a week supervised. That is until she told me that the only contact should be through her lawyer. I am from England, and currently a LPR, and apart from the gamut of accusations of mental cruelty, threats to life, and worse that I intend to kidnap the child, there are worse accusations but we need not go there. My question is with the legal system structured the way it is, am I ever likely to be able to see this child on my terms, without wasting whats left of my finances following procedures.


Dear Andrew

Some people are intuitive and some have great imagination and that imagination at times becomes extreme and creates fear. That fear becomes paranoia and soon these people create a wall around them. It has nothing to do with you.
You may be a fine guy but it is she who needs help.

Agreed many women need extra care during pregnancy or they develop distance in their minds. From what you write it appears that she is really not close to you ei she doesnt feel close to you. Her attitude is probably based on her childhood fears or other stories she read or heard.

The best you can do is to distance for the moment completely. Give up and let it go. Whatever you do at this point will be against you. If you calm down, leave her and let her be where she wants, and go through the imposed divorce, you will have a chance later on.

She will return one day IF you dont put any hurdles. You can talk to the judge or court people or write them but try getting out of her way. She is not going to let you WIN or what she perceives winning.

Trust me she will communicate once you freeze all communication from your side. Respond to her accusations in a calm way and it is fruitless to resist and fight.

Soon after 6 m or a year things will sort out and you could restart your life. If she returns or comes back you can then decide what to do but not at this point.

editor

i have been through the same situation before and
if you really love her then you should try and
ride it out once the trust is lost it takes a very
long time to get it back...im not for sure if it
really ever comes back like it was before because
there will always be doubts but if you both really
love each other then you can work through this!

sit her down and talk to her about why she cheated
maybe she needed a little more attention from you
and you just know it because alot of women try and
hint around to their husbands but their husbands
arent really getting the message...see what she
says about it and then go from there! dont stay
for the kids because in the long run they know
when something is wrong between mom and dad and
they are the ones getting the most hurt out of t

There is no reason whatsoever to stay with someone who disrespects you to such an extent that she would give her body over to another man. I understand that you want the best for your kids, but in the long run it would be more mentally healthy for your kids to grow up learning respect, trust and true love from two seperate parents.

still in love but think it's all over. wife cheated, and i lost trust. she wants to come back but i think its for the wrong reasons.
need to decide what to do, for the kids sake. and mine.
but what should I do? we've tried once to make it work and it didnt work.
but im still reluctant to let go.
been together for 16 years, we were childhood sweethearts.
is it worth loosing her?

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