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I LOVE BUT SHE DOES NOT

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i love a girl she also love me but for some reason i gave her a rude letter.so she get angry with me.i cannot convince her.can you give me some suggetions how to write a letter to her to convince her.letter is only way to reach her.

Well the first impressions do count a great deal. It will be your real, consistent good behaviour and many letters written with sincerity may convince her that you are not rude. You can say that you were rude for a particular reason but not with her but with that reason. Explain that reason in details.

editor

I met a girl ( we worked for the same company, only at different locations, 400 miles apart)we were both recently divorced, we dated and it developed into a serious (long distance) relationship. We ultimately started talking of marriage and felt that we both loved each other very much. She agreed that she would like to marry me, so, I put in for a company transfer and got it. I moved in with my "fiance". Now, after 4 weeks of living together, she tells me that she loves me very much but does not know if she will ever be able to remarry again, because of a fear of failure I guess. I am heartbroken. I love her very much and I do not want to be pushy, yet at the same time I am confused about what to do. I wonder if she really does love me or not because to me marriage is a committment of love and trust, so does this mean that she does not really love and / or trust me? I only believe in living together if it is leading to marriage. Do I move out? I hate to think of that but I am confused on what to do. Any helpful suggestions would be greatly appreciated. I love her very much and would do anything for her, I just do not want to lose her.


Well tough choice here. You may be over worried yet you must follow your own instinct. If you both really understand each other and think there is enough trust thats a very good news.

Now if she is afraid of committment at this stage that does not mean she may not love you. Love is a very deep bond. Marriage is a superficial social certification.

Hence if there is love you may slowly remove her fears and show that marriage is a serious business and you have good intentions. When the bond of trust is solidified and she feels no fear I think she will herself want to enter into formal agreement of marriage.

So try knowing her more on emotional level, understand her past hurt or injury and gain access to her dreams by communicating with sincerity. Thats all. Rest will follow on its own.

Pl do write back.

editor

i met this guy in september and he's in love with me and i also love him too but he seems to be a playboy as he has never make any attempt taking me to his house rather he takes me to his friends house and would want to play with me in his friends house which i turn down, and was not happy with him. since that day he has refuse to reply my emails even when i appologies to him and also he stop calling when i call him he tells me he 's very busy and that he will call me. right now am confused please advise i still love him.

i have know this guy for some weeks and he asked me if i have a guy that am presently dating, i did give him an example immediately rather i told him i was going to let him know the next time we meet. the second time we met already there is this strong intimacy between both of us, so reminded me of what he asked me and i told him YES as soon as i said so he became angry with me that i have been playing around with his love and he needed someone that is presently on her own i knew i was just pulling his legs just to know what he has in mind for me. though he told me that he has a girlfriend that has been away for 8 months and not very sure if she will come back again. later i told him i was only pulling his legs that presently am alone and that i don't have any boyfriend he never believe me right now he 's no longer interested in me i have tried all i could to beg him to please forgive me and lets come back together he say no that i lie to him. please i need your advise.

He is relating his first 'experience' with you which is an incidental issue for you, as a yardstick to measure your value system as a whole.

It is very hard for some people to convince and win someone's trust who have their very hardcore value system and they may have some reasons to do so.

However you are not on that scale of belief and dont take it as a rejection but as an expression of different styles. You can write him a long letter trying to explain your inner truth and debate this issue. If he understands your point he will respond, if not forget him and dont waste your time as it can be an unending quest. You dont meet on same grounds hence consider it a potential drag.

editor

I'm in love with a guy( I'm 21 and he's 26), who likes me but doesn't love me. I've got a feeling that if I stick to it, it can work out, coz he is an emotionally withdrawn person, but utterly sweet and I love him a lot. But again, it may not work. And I can't go on waiting forever! I too have a life to live! It's an online realtionship and we are oceans apart, but that's not a problem. I've tried to talk myself out of this hopeless situation but to no avail. Give me some concrete advice so that i'm able to end this thing once and for all.

ok we have known each other for quite a times and we used to spend many times together .it was she who told me if i was like fallin for her and when i said yes she said that she is already marrried but she is just 16 and i know that she lied to me but the person she talked bout is real i saw him but she is like havin some feelings for me for she did cut her hands when she saw some cuts on mine if this is like goin on forever i dunno what to do pplz help me

Dhruva,
That is sweet, but i think you lot from India only focus on things like "girls" and nothing beyond that can reach your thoughts, wake up and face up to reality, u lot make me laugh, how can you propose to someone without fully knowing whether she feels the same without you, and that too over the phone. come on lol!!! if u are so bothered about this then talk to her in person, be a man, i think she will appreciate this more, but if you end up getting a slap then dont blame me, as u asked for advice and here it is.

Sorry if i sound cold but thats me.

I LOVE A GIRL OF THE SAME INSTITUTE.I ALSO PROPOSED HER IN THE PHONE.BUT SHE ONLY SAID
"NO".SHE ONLY WANTS ME TO BE A FRIEND.BUT
FROM MY VIEW I THINK THAT SHE ALSO LIKES ME.
EVEN THOUGH SHE DID NOT ACCEPT MY PROPOSAL
SHE ALWAYS TALKS TO ME.BUT I AM TRYING TO
RUN AWAY FROM HER AS I AM ASHAMED OF WHAT I
HAVE DONE.STILL I BELIEVE I LOVE HER.

I THINK THERE MAY BE SOME REASONS BEHIND
HER DENIAL.WE ARE ALL FRESHERS i.e.WE ARE NEWLY
ADMITTED.THERE MAY BE SOME PRESSURES FROM THE SENIORS.ON THE FIRST TALK IN THE PHONE SHE SHOWED SOME SIGN THAT SHE LIKES ME SAYING THAT IT WILL
ONLY RETARD OUR STUDIES.I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO.
PLEASE HELP.

This is not love but attraction.

If the attraction is mutual and you interact and know more of each other then you reach to a point of mutual love.

Do not waste your time. Focus on studies and when you are emotionally ready you will find someone.
You cant force anyone.

Editor

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