NEW community site to expand your social life  DatingMating.com  - JOIN FREE

Archive through September 24, 2002

Marriage Partner discussions on matrimonial family issues: After DIVORCE - Dealing with life - Starting Afresh - What Next?: Dealing with EX Friends Forever?: Archive through September 24, 2002



Join the most exciting new community on Family issues. You will like it.
idealFamily.Com - Discuss family issues Life styles household, housekeeping and secrets to family life

IdealFamily.com is a clean community for all moms, dads and members of family who want to live a loving, fulfilling life. Please join it free and share your love. Win new friends and receive plenty of blessings and love.

 


imean.com Discussion topics on Race relations, world politics, social economic systems and other such topics

By Anonymous on Tuesday, September 24, 2002 - 10:14 pm:

hi my name is shirley,
please help me. i been married for 22 years, and my sex life is down i am 48 years old and my husband is 47. sex don't bother me at all any more and i don't know why, my husband is looking to be with anybody 27 years old to in their 30's. he says i am to old. I love my husband and i would like our sex to be like it was when we frist met. he sleeps by him self and i sleep in my diving room cause i don't want to sleep with him. and i would like to once again but i need some help to inprove my sex life, so i hope somebody can help me.

thank you!



By Broken Shattered Heart. on Monday, September 23, 2002 - 07:28 pm:

I have been married for almost 25 years. I have three of the most incredible teenage girls one could ever dream of and a great family.I have been suffering for many years, going to therapy trying to do whatever I could to make my relationship work. My husband has been using pot for years, sex has always been prime importance to him, reluctantly I have gone along with him pushing my self into situations I didn't want to be in ,but to make him happy, so maybe I could get back what I really most importantly wanted in my life.LOVE AND AFFECTION KISSES and HUGS KINDNESS AND SWEETNESS.. I maybe got it for a day after the episode or durring a vacation but it never lasted more than that.I believe he wants to, but just cant, for some reason. He has been abusive toward me all these years,verbally ,and emotionally, sometimes he says he is sorry and wants to change . Says he loves me and heis a good person other then when it comes to me. He admits to be bisexual. He is always on the internet in gaychat rooms. But he tells me he is scared. I cant tell my story to anyone, I dont want to hurt my family more than the abuse and arguing they have already whitnessed in their lives. I have tried to keep it together , but am falling apart and dieing inside. I hurt so bad, I can baerly sleep in my bed anymore. I am extremly warm ,carring ,intelligent,and have been told all through my life sexy beautiful and gourgous, my heart is huge ,so huge that I think of my parents, children and family,so much that every time I want to do something I can't because how much I will hurt them. I know I deserve better than this. I don't want to go on anymore, I have lost all hope for any changes in him, and I can not remain in this painful place. It makes it very hard when you can't speak and are hidding so much. Im glad to get this out annonamously,and need some encouragement or advise on support, for help. Other than this I am a very strong and powerful person, so I need some very strong intelligentand powerful source of help. I have prayed , and it hasn't helped yet. I hope there is someone out there who can give me some strength and advise. Thanks for listening BROKEN-SHATTERED HEART


The wise course for you will be to expose him in all your family and seek professional help and therapy for him. By your silence probbably you have encouraged him to go wild.

Men do wild things when their women support their actions. You should have spoken long time ago.

Alternatively give him a short time frame and ask him to seek professional help or you would like to move on. Persons under influence of drugs are not stable. They fall down quickly once their support system is withdrawn.

He will only change when you show that you are serious and assertive. Otherwise you will continue to sulk inside and nothing will happen ever.

Please act now.
Moderator



By Anonymous on Wednesday, September 18, 2002 - 07:00 am:

I've been recently divorced. My wife left me without informing me on one fine day. While I'm at work she cleanedup the whole place, I didn't knew her whereabouts for a while and I didn't care. After a week she left, I hear from her lawyer and a divorce proceeding was in place. After two months, we had a property settlement agreement and decided not to see each other ever again, I started moving on. Well and good, but unannounced one night, after a couple of months, she stops by my place and demanded to know if I still love her. I got suckered and admitted to her that I can't shake off the feelings for her. I sent her e-mails after that thinking if she is reconsidering, I can give it a try, she never replied to a single mail. Throughout this what I didnt realize is, she is manipulating me and my feelings and wants to keep her security blanket in place, if things dont work out for her outside. For her selfish reasons, she messed with my mind and manipulated me and never let me go. Finally, I decided enough is enough and I wrote her a final mail, denouncing her tactics and her self centered behaviour. It is very therapuetic after that. The first thing to dealing afresh is to distance the other person from your thoughts as much as possible. I'm lucky I dont have any kids, I shudder to think how a manipulating woman like her could have destroyed my life using children as leverage.

Carl, my sympathies to you. This society is so biased towards women, especially in divorce and child custody, all I can say is goodluck. Your ex-wife appears to be conniving, cruel and very manipulative women. It is very difficult to deal with women like hers.



By Carl on Wednesday, September 11, 2002 - 02:36 am:

i was married for nine horrible years to my ex-wife melinda who aborted our first child, then after two miscarriages we had a son. she divorced me and kept everything including coming into my condo and taking everything else she wanted. we went to court regarding custody of our son and we have joint custody. recently she has turned me in on a neglect charge and is trying to work me out of our sons life. she has recently married a wealthy gentleman and i thought this would be the end of my troubles but it appears she is a constant aggravating force in my life.



By kitkit on Tuesday, August 20, 2002 - 05:16 am:

I have been married for 3 years to the most wonderful man (he is 35 years old)and I just found out that he was messing around with a 19 year where he works but claims it is over. It is eating me alive, I just can't believe he did this us. He was constantly telling me how happy and in love he is with me but then went and did this. It really makes me sick to my stomach as he has a daughter who is 14. He wants us to go to counseling and work this out but I am so hurt and don't think I can every forgive --- any advice?



By DEEPAK on Wednesday, July 10, 2002 - 11:34 am:

I LOVE MARAGE LIFE.ITS DIFFERENT YOU KNOW.WHAT THIS?



By Anonymous on Tuesday, July 2, 2002 - 11:37 pm:

I have been married for seven years and we have a little boy.I love her with all my heart but she says that she doesn't love me any more.I would give this woman the world if I could..before you feel sorry for me this is how it happen.I hit her more then one time.We have been seperated for about six months now.I am going to counlsling for my problem, but she says that she can't trust me and that she needs time.....WHAT DO I DO, SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE ME ADVICE!!



By jo on Friday, July 5, 2002 - 05:43 am:

Hi there

I work for a magazine called 'That's Life' and i
work for it for various reasons. Everyone has had
their ups and downs, it's important to use your
experiences to inspire and help others. I'm based
in Australia and am looking for people that will
talk honestly about their personal feelings /
experiences / relationships / opinions etc and i
wondered if any of you might want to do an
article. It could be to do with a previous
relationship or inspiring others to get out there
and look for love.

Well, I'd like to have a chat with you, so give me
a call on 02 946 43 406 or just e-mail me back and
i can ring you to save your phone bill.

I hope to hear from you soon.

T



By Anonymous on Saturday, June 29, 2002 - 10:24 pm:

Hi,me and my girlfriend have been dating for about
9 months now almost 10 months are relationship is very good I support her the way a women should be supported.But sometimes in a relationship theres always a family member that doesn't approve of a couple dating like me.

Her mother is very hard on her and tells her who to see who to date who call things like that.Are relationship is along distance one but i'm hear with her in her city staying with my dad but I can not see her or call her at all not even go to see a movie together.At times I cry myself to sleep then agina at times I just close my eyes think about her and fall asleep.So I need advice because I don't know what to do Should I give it time and maybe her mom will come around or what please tell me?

A mother has more rights on her children and knows the best how to guide them.

You are not related or married to her.
Some parents do not believing in dating.

Others want to protect their children from doing mistakes they did or others did and they want to keep their children saved from possible emotional disasters.

You should not take it wrongly.
If you are serious and interested and can stand on your own, legally of age etc. you should propose a marriage. Dating is a process to know others.

You should be proud of her family that they keep good standards but it has nothing to do with you personally probably. You should think if you were a father would you allow your daughter to date whosoever she wants whenever she wants or will you guide her?

Ed.